The Slopes of Self-Doubt: How I Learned to Stop Playing It Safe

Finding Comfort in the Safety Zone

I've always loved downhill skiing. When I was younger, I lived for the thrill of carving down mountains while taking in breathtaking alpine vistas. Then life happened – I had kids, work got busy, I got older, and skiing took a backseat. When we finally returned to the slopes as a family, everything looked different. Our days revolved around teaching techniques, watching little ones pizza-wedge their way down bunny slopes, and taking frequent hot chocolate breaks.

But something unexpected and silently happened as my children grew. While their abilities soared – tackling black diamonds and racing through moguls – I remained anchored to my comfort zone. I found myself becoming the family's limiting factor, regularly waving them off with a smile while I "rested" at the lodge. I told myself this was fine. After all, I was still skiing, still enjoying the familiar runs, and hadn't taken a fall in years. I wore my conservative approach like a badge of honor.

The Wake-Up Call

What I didn't realize was that my pride in "playing it safe" masked a deeper truth: I had stopped growing. The uncertainty of harder runs and challenging conditions triggered an automatic "no" in my mind. Worse yet, I was missing precious moments with my family, watching them disappear down exciting trails while I stayed behind in my bubble of predictability.

Skiing with my kids

Taking The Leap

This year, something shifted. I made a conscious decision to challenge my self-imposed limitations. I found myself at the top of a black diamond run, heart pounding, telling myself, "You can do this." Did I struggle? Absolutely. Did I fall? Multiple times. Did doubt creep in? With every turn.

But here's what else happened: I got up. Every single time. I completed runs I never thought possible. And most surprisingly, I enjoyed it. I discovered that when I simply trusted in my capabilities and believed in my ability to recover from falls, the skiing came more naturally. The revelation hit me like a blast of mountain air – most of my limitations existed solely in my mind.

Yes, there's physical conditioning involved in becoming a better skier. But just like strengthening muscles through exercise, we can strengthen our courage through practice. Each small victory builds upon the last, creating a foundation of confidence.

From Slopes to Leadership: A Universal Pattern

This pattern of playing it safe hadn't just manifested on the slopes – it had shadowed my entire career. How many times had I stayed silent instead of offering my perspective in a key meeting? How often had I avoided reaching out to that executive for a meeting? How often had I watched from the sidelines as others volunteered to lead major initiatives? Was I avoiding these opportunities because of genuine inability, or was I simply afraid of falling – or in this case, failing publicly?

Taking professional risks is like building any other muscle. At first, it feels unnatural and uncomfortable. You look at colleagues who seem to navigate challenges effortlessly and feel exposed in comparison. But making the deliberate choice to push beyond your comfort zone yields unexpected rewards. Start small. Build gradually. Will you succeed every time? No. Will you succeed more often than you expect? Absolutely. 

Tackling a challenging slope

Coaching Leaders Beyond Comfort to Growth

As a leadership coach, I see this pattern repeated in conversations with clients across different industries and experience levels. A talented engineering director hesitates to apply for the VP role, believing she needs 'just one more year' of experience. A technical lead continues managing small projects, despite having innovative ideas for company-wide initiatives. These professionals aren't held back by lack of capability – they're held back by self-imposed limitations.

What I've learned, both personally and through coaching others, is that growth rarely feels comfortable in the moment. But just as I discovered on those challenging ski runs, our capacity for handling uncertainty and challenge often far exceeds our self-imposed boundaries. The only true obstacle standing between you and growth is the barrier you've built in your mind.

Ready to push beyond your comfort zone? Ask yourself:

• What's your equivalent of the challenging ski run you've been avoiding?

• What story are you telling yourself about why you can't tackle it?

• What's the smallest step you could take today toward that challenge?

If you're ready to stop playing it safe and start reaching your full potential, let's talk. As a leadership coach, I help professionals identify and break through their self-imposed limitations. Schedule a complimentary discovery call to explore how we can work together to get you out of your own way and onto your next peak of achievement.